so I’m getting a feeling that reader b has / does sacrifice a lot more mc!sonny! Does he acknowledge that? Does she maybe resent him a little because she does give up a lot ( putting finals on back burner, having to kind of reassure him during there fight so he leaves to do business etc)?

carisi-dreams:

I think I got a little heavy handed in the last sentence of the fill that was part 2 of the convo w/ sonny after the fight…ha. whoops

sonny already knows, somewhat. he’s mentioned it:

here “I’m sorry, doll. Had to. You know I wish I—” he started to say with his lips grazing your jaw.“Yeah, me too,” you cut him off and he made another apologetic noise and reached up to turn your face to look up at him.” 

& here “I know you’ve been feeling…I know you’ve been upset that the club keeps leaking into our few moments we have just you and I.” 

it’s been obvious to him and even though he is sometimes careless, he’s not oblivious. he hasn’t been brave enough to bring it up in a conversation. (and she nailed that kind of thing with these comments “Look at me sitting here crying and heartbroken because you couldn’t just say you were scared. That’s what all of this was. You were scared of me getting hurt, scared of me leaving you, scared of letting me down.” ) 

he understands that it’s been a strain, but he doesn’t see the very subtle sacrifices. putting the last final on the back burner (although it gets resolved quite easily) he sees, but having to be the one to push him to get him out of the shower when she’d prefer to just comfort him he doesn’t see. it eats up at her to have to be so…solid? he also understands that it’s a sacrifice for her to push him out of the door to handle business when they’re in the middle of reconciling–he feels it, acutely–but he doesn’t understand how deep it is. there is no other choice, really, he does have to go handle business. but it’s frustrating for her to have to be the one to push him to do things versus him just doing it and making up for it later or fixing it. one of those-we both know what has to be done stop making me be the one making you do the thing you need to do because it’s a burden for me and I want to be selfish for once-kinds of things.

there’s no resentment…per se. but it’s frustrating and everyone has a threshold. it’s not resentment because it’s clear to her that sonny is really trying his best to balance things. and they both grew up in the MC life so they knew what to expect. it’s different from seeing your parents relationship to living a relationship in the MC, though. it may or may not come to a bit of a head in the next part of the ongoing conversation post Emily encounter… >:)